ost unhappy people try to cover up, but the signs of an unhappy person are there to see if you look closely.
So often, people are deceived by smiles, laughter and sharing of memes on social media that they don’t realize a friend, family member or loved one is sad.
This is why depression and suicide are on the rise. Unhappy people do an excellent job of hiding it. I know you care about the people in your life, so I have written this article. To help you spot signs of unhappiness when you see it in your spouse, family member or friends.
15 Signs Of An Unhappy Person
1. They Look Absent-minded
Have you ever had this experience where you were hanging out with your friend and pouring out your heart to that friend only for you to ask them a question or fix your eyes on them and discover they were not even listening?
You shake them, and they jolt back to reality, apologizing and asking you to repeat what you said. That is one of the signs of an unhappy person.
An unhappy person will find it challenging to dwell in the present. The focus will always be on a sad event or a future they wish to have. You can spend the whole day with them, and they won’t say anything.
They’d instead keep listening while they fix their minds on something else. So when you notice someone close to you in this state, it is often better to try as much as possible to be in touch and find out what is wrong.
2. They Are Cranky
What does it mean for someone to be cranky? When a person is cranky, everything gets to them and irritates them. The person suddenly lacks the patience to deal with annoyances, no matter how trivial.
Staying with someone cranky can as well affect your mood. They burst into fits of rage when people around them make mistakes or offend them in any way.
Cranky people could even get into a fight simply because someone stepped on them. If your friend or partner is getting edgy and trying to pick a fight with just about anyone that offends them, they might be cranky.
But crankiness is the symptom and not the cause. An irritable person has something underlying that is affecting their mood. And one of those things is sadness. Perhaps they are unhappy that a business deal didn’t go well or they failed an exam.
3. They Have Sad Eyes
The eyes, they say, are windows to the soul. So, to see the signs of an unhappy person, you should look into their eyes. Unfortunately, their eyes are usually sunken and weak. It is almost as if they are sick.
But, on careful perusal, you could find they even have sleep bags and dark circles around their eyes.
An unhappy person will have eyes that look heavy and droopy. Not just that, but how their eyes react to things that happen around them is different and slower. Usually, when you tell someone news that is supposed to excite or alarm, the pupil of their eyes dilates.
But this is very different for someone unhappy. In the event of exciting or alarming news, you’d notice that the person’s eyes do not light up. Instead, it remains dull as ever
4. They No Longer Care
It is human nature to worry and care about people and things that affect them. Typically, people will care about their overall appearance before heading out in the morning.
People will care about their egos, looks and responsibilities. Everyone would want to look their best, be their best and show up when they should. But not an unhappy person.
One sign that someone is sad is when they no longer worry and care about anything happening. They can stroll out of their house in the afternoon in their nighties to grab a cup of coffee. Their appearance no longer matters to them
At work, they do not even try. There is no effort on their side to keep up with their responsibilities. As a result, life suddenly loses its spark. Their health and house might be messy, and they would not care.
5. They Engage in Unhealthy Habits
Want to know one of the signs of an unhappy person? Well, take a good look at their habits. A sad person would most likely start indulging in harmful practices to numb their feelings.
For example, someone might discover their partner of so many years has been cheating on them with their best friend and file for a divorce. The weight of the betrayal hits them hard, and they resort to drinking.
You find them at the bar drowning their woes. But the drinking does not stop there. They continue when they get home. It becomes almost impossible to see them in a sober state.
It could be alcohol or drugs, but once a person uses a substance to cope, they are unhappy and need urgent help. Learn about some harmful negative habits unhappy people indulge
6. They Complain A Lot
As long as we are alive and on earth, unpleasant things will keep happening. Something that we did not plan for will happen and rile us up. That is normal; that is how life works. Sometimes when these things happen, we tend to complain.
Sometimes we sulk and ask why it had to be us. Typically, you’d expect someone to make the most of what has happened and move on. But not an unhappy person. Such a person complains about everything. It does not matter how trivial or crucial.
Complaints and grumbling always happen. It will often irritate and make you wonder if the person is the only one passing through difficulties.
When you notice someone like that, who complains about everything in their life, there is an underlying issue causing such a person severe unhappiness.
7. They Sleep A Lot
We all know that sleeping is vital. One is even recommended to get 8 hours of sleep for good health and to function optimally.
Sleeping is the best way for the human body to rest and recharge. If someone gets 6-8 hours of sleep daily, that is fine.
But if you notice that someone spends most of the day sleeping, that is one of the signs of an unhappy person. It is vital to note that these signs of unhappiness rarely occur alone. An unhappy person will exhibit multiple signs of unhappiness.
For example, a man who lost his job and has also lost hope in life would drown himself in alcohol all through the night and then sleep for most of the day. And when he wakes, the first thing he resorts to again is drinking.
8. They Inflict Injuries On Themselves
This is one of the saddest signs of an unhappy person. You find that some unhappy people inflict injuries on themselves. And they do this to shift their attention from what is causing their unhappiness to the pain of the injury.
This is a common coping mechanism for traumatized people. For example, someone might have been a victim of abuse, and their mind replays the horrors of that abuse. This person can resort to cutting themselves to deal with the emotional trauma.
Unhappy people can also hurt themselves because they feel like they deserve to be punished for wrongdoing. For example, a man might drive with his friend or friends, then an accident occurs.
One or some of his friends die, and the experience keeps haunting him. He feels it is his fault and keeps hurting himself as punishment.
9. They Avoid People So They Can Hide What They’re Going Through
Most times, unhappy people hide their problems. They do not want people to know what they are going through. They don’t want people to see the mess they have become, so they hide away.
It is not uncommon for them to hide; they do this, so you don’t start feeling sorry for them and pitying them when you discover their problem. One of the signs of an unhappy person is cancelling a plan to meet at the last minute.
At first, they are reluctant to meet. When you finally convince them to come out, they reluctantly agree, only to cancel at the last minute. It doesn’t end there; it also becomes a habit for them not to answer calls or texts.
They always pretend that something dire is holding them down when in reality, they are fighting their demons. If you notice someone behaving like this, you should know such a person needs immediate help.
10. They Avoid Eye Contact
Since the eyes are windows to the soul, it is not surprising that unhappy people tend to avoid eye contact. This is because they feel that once they meet your gaze, you will look right through their façade and discover they are dying inside.
It is like someone trying to avoid eye contact while lying. So, when you ask them how they are doing, they respond that they are fine when they are not. Eye contact also makes unhappy people anxious.
This is because they want to avoid judgement if you find out they are unhappy. Often, this is why people keep it to themselves when they are hurting. They do not want to be judged.
Imagine a billionaire expressing that they were tired of life. Most people would judge them instead of care about them and wonder why they are unhappy with all of their wealth. So, to prevent these, unhappy people avoid making eye contact.
11. They No Longer Do Things They Enjoy
This one is a no-brainer. It is a chief sign that someone is unhappy. So, do you have a friend with whom you go to the games every Friday night after work? And then, on one Friday, they refuse. You didn’t think much of it.
After all, things happen, and people must care for other things. But along the line, you notice that it is not just one Friday. Several Fridays have passed, and they have not shown up at the games, something you know they enjoy; that is a sign that all may not be well.
Be observant of the people around you. Something may be wrong when you notice your spouse no longer rubs your feet while reading or your roommate no longer stays up late into the night playing video games.
12. They Are Sometimes Judgmental
This one comes from a place of insecurity in one’s self. An insecure person will always project their fears onto someone else.
For example, if you have a partner who is afraid you might cheat on them, they are likely to project their fears on you.
And it is the same for someone unhappy. They have the tendency sometimes to project their fears and woes onto others. Maybe they are sad their spouse left them, so they project that onto another couple.
If you see someone always judging other people’s appearance, demeanor and carriage, especially if what they are critiquing are minor issues, then that person has an underlying cause of unhappiness.
13. They See Themselves as Victims
Have you ever been with someone who thinks everything and everyone has conspired against them? Have you ever been with someone who feels the whole world is just waiting for their failure and downfall?
It can be pretty annoying to deal with such a person as a spouse, friend or family member. It is almost as if they are always ready to receive a pity party.
If this kind of person encounters a setback at work, they do not bother to check what led to the reversal and then find ways to prevent it from happening again. Instead, they conclude that team members or superiors are hunting them.
And this is such a sad mentality to have. It is one of the signs of an unhappy person. People like this need to be reminded that they have actual power over their lives and can take responsibility for the change they don’t know they need.
14. They Feel Lonely
One of the signs of an unhappy person is that they always feel lonely. One mistake most people make is they think being alone is the same as being lonely. But that is not always the case.
Of course, someone can be lonely because they are alone, but sometimes, they can also be lonely even when they are not alone. For instance, a recruit in the army can be surrounded by many other recruits and still feel lonely.
When someone feels lonely, they feel like they are empty and unwanted. This person might be in a crowd but won’t fit in. They would want to connect but cannot get themselves to do so.
This feeling of loneliness can be caused by unhappiness. And this unhappiness could be because the person lost a dear one, their job or moved to another country.
15. They Are Pessimists
Unhappy people sometimes show chronic pessimism. They are always thinking something terrible will happen. It is as though they are on the lookout for the negative.
No matter how good things happen to and for them, they would expect a storm to cook out of nowhere and steal their joy. This kind of pessimism comes from years and years of hoping for the best and getting the worst such that it numbs their ability to be hopeful.
As humans, we do many things with hope, hoping to succeed. But when one gets to the point where they always expect something to go wrong, they have an underlying issue of unhappiness.
Also, unhappy people can project their pessimism onto others. Once you are close to them, they always think and speak about the worse- case scenario.
Signs You Are Not Happy With Yourself
There are several signs you are not happy with yourself. Here are some of them:
1. You Feel You Don’t Matter
One of the ways to figure out that you are not happy with yourself is when you feel like you don’t matter.
But you do matter, and you occupy space in this world for a reason. You need to find your purpose and bask in it.
2. You Are Afraid
Fear can be a crippling emotion that robs you of happiness. You wonder if you will pass that exam, ace that interview or your boss will say yes to your proposal. These fearful thoughts can take a toll on your mind and prevent you from being happy.
3. You Feel Tired About Everything
Have you ever been in a situation where you get tired of life? You don’t get suicidal, but you feel like quitting everything, recoiling on your couch and shutting out the world? That feeling is one you have when you are unhappy.
Signs of An Unhappy Man
Here are some of the signs of an unhappy man:
1. He No Longer Shows Affection
One of the signs that a man is unhappy is how he treats those in his life. If a man has something making him sad, you will notice that he will no longer show affection to his loved one. It will look like he is at loggerheads with his wife, siblings, kids, parents and friends.
2. He Looks Stressed
Unhappiness has a particular way of showing on the face and the whole body. When a man has been sad for long, it shows on his body. He looks stressed, and one would even assume that he is sick.
3. He Does Not Share What He Thinks or How He Feels
An unhappy man is sometimes mute. He makes no demands and does not respond to any request. He does not share his feelings or thoughts; he lets life move past him.
Signs of A Miserable Woman
The signs of a miserable woman are:
1. She Likes Pointing Fingers (Blaming People)
One of the signs of a miserable woman is pointing fingers. It is easy for her to see the wrong in others and very hard for her to see her flaws. And the worst part is how they point it out. They point it out so the subject can be sad and miserable, not to correct.
2. She Doesn’t Believe That Anyone is Good
Perhaps due to the negative experiences they’ve had in life, it is difficult for them to see the good in anyone. They don’t believe someone can be friendly without wanting something in return. To them, everyone is one big rotten apple.
3. She Likes Nothing About Herself
A miserable woman likes nothing about herself. She knows she is sad, and she sometimes tries to make others around her miserable as well.
What Are The Habits Of Unhappy People?
What are the habits of unhappy people? Some habits of unhappy people are:
1. Believing Life Happens To Them
Sometimes, unhappy people think they cannot change their situation. You see someone who lost their job go into substance abuse instead of re-strategizing and trying again. They feel helpless and succumb to the point of accepting whatever life throws at them.
2. They Are Highly Irritable
Unhappy people can be easily irritated sometimes. Little things trigger them. They cannot seem to let go of flimsy things. So it is not a surprise when an unhappy person over-reacts.
Something that can be overlooked or quickly addressed would become a big issue. They always make a mountain out of a molehill.
3. Being Friends With Other Sad People
Misery loves company, and this is precisely what happens with unhappy people. They quickly bond with other unhappy people.
The congregation thrives by trading sob stories back and forth, almost like a competition for who has it worse. In this company, they find that their feelings are validated instead of challenged.
4. They Ignore Actual Problems
Unhappy people do not know how to handle actual life problems, so they ignore them, hoping they go away. They never believe they have the power to do anything.
Conclusion
It can be difficult to spot someone unhappy because most unhappy people go to great lengths to hide it. For example, a sad person who cuts himself would wear long sleeves so no one notices that their wrists are injured.
An unhappy person who notices that their eyes are puffed due to weeping or have dark circles due to lack of sleep would wear shades when they go out in public. But the tips in this article will give you clues as to how to spot if your friend or loved one is unhappy.
