I don’t want to sound corny, but YOU are seriously an awesome person with some amazingly unique attributes. Actually taking time to think about them will help you start seeing yourself as attractive.
I mean, think about it! How many times have you met a person (guy or girl) who was very attractive, but once you got to know them and know the REAL them, they didn’t look so attractive after a while?
And that’s why I really wanted to help you out with this. Yes, I will be giving some outer appearance tips, but mainly, I want you to focus on the inner you and loving what’s inside that.
Side Note: Let me know your thoughts on these tips and what you think makes people attractive in the comments down below. I’d love to hear!
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1. Who IS the Real You?
One of the BIGGEST ways to appear more attractive is being the real you around others. But that sounds cliche and frustrating doesn’t it?How do you be the real you?
Well here’s one way.
One important thing you can do is to listen to the negative things you say about yourself in your head & out loud. Usually, we don’t act like ourselves because we don’t feel comfortable being ourselves. We tell ourselves negative things like, “I’m awkward, “I’m weird,” “I’m stupid,” and because of this we assume OTHERS see us the same way. I’ve had the same problem and am currently working on getting rid of it myself!
Now once you find these negative thought patterns, I want you to stay conscious of them and REPLACE them with positive thoughts. Example, “No… I’m not stupid or weird or awkward, I’m a good person and people like me. They want to get to know me!”
You have NO idea how many times people really did like me and did want to get to know me (they saw the good in me, not ALL the mistakes I had made over my lifetime that I was STILL guilt-tripping myself over!), but I ended up projecting how I saw myself onto them. I assumed that’s how they saw me too.
So I stepped away from that. Now, I’m CHOOSING to realize that people do like me and see me differently. And if they have an attitude and are mean, that’s on them, not a reflection on me.
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2. How to Love How You Look in Clothing
Say this with me, “I do NOT look bad in clothes, but SOME clothes don’t look good on me.”
Clothing looking bad on you is NOT your fault!
I don’t care what size you are, clothing can look VERY good on you. It’s all about understanding your body shape and knowing HOW to style your body shape.
There are so many awesome blog posts or Youtube tutorials on how to figure out your body shape and dress for it; so empower yourself and feel confident!
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3. Be Attentive
When talking to people, don’t ignore them. I mean think about it; how many times have you felt frustrated when you could tell someone was completely zoning you out OR just waiting for you to get finished so they could say what they wanted to say?
So much of being attractive comes from your very actions and putting others first. And I don’t mean constantly sacrificing for other; I just mean having a mindset to make others feel the way YOU would want to feel.
4. Happiness
Now I’m obviously not saying you have to be happy ALL THE TIME . But practicing gratefulness for the good things in your life is a great way to be happier and spread happiness to others. Just as studies often indicate how having a good sense of humor helps one appear attractive, so will spreading happiness too.
I mean, how many times have you distanced yourself from a friend who became more negative over time? You tried to listen and offer solutions, but they wouldn’t take it. It’s honestly exhausting and frustrating and soon you don’t want to be around that person; they just don’t want to take the actions to make their life better and whenever you do talk, it’s ALL about them and their problems.
Now I doubt that you’re like this. But even so, I think it’s great to make sure you’re staying conscious of the above (gratefulness) so that you don’t stay stuck in a dark place and you’re a person people naturally gravitate towards.
5. Can You Be Attractive but Not at the Same Time?
Here’s the thing: you could be the most attractive person around but still appear unattractive. Think about VERY attractive actors who play the role of very average people in films. Their clothing looks like it was quickly picked off a sales rack, their hair (and makeup if a woman) is nondescript, and they carry themselves in an unconfident way.
THEN compare that to how they look on the red carpet. Their hair and makeup is completely changed and their outfit is tailored and looks like they had great thought put into it.
I kid you not! They look like a completely different person, and I had THE EXACT same experience.
I got into this rhythm for a few years of basically just wearing jeans and shirt and hardly ever doing my hair and makeup. And then in 2019, I FINALLY planned out a capsule wardrobe, went to the mall and bought what I needed and I never looked back.
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In fact, one of my closest friends told me her first impression when meeting me last year. She told me that I looked confident and like I knew what I was doing.
And I promise you, the way you fix yourself up will not only change how you look, but how you act. You will definitely be giving off alpha vibes.
6. This One Thing Will Also Make You Stand Out & Feel Different
Having a good posture can change how you look instantly. You suddenly stand out amongst everyone else who is slouching and look a lot more slender and graceful. In fact, a 1997 study found that good posture was a factor in how participants (university students) rated people’s attractiveness in photos.
And you know what? When you have good posture, you end up sending messages to your brain that makes you feel more empowered and confident (I’m not joking!). So try practicing it this week and see how you feel!
You deserve to feel better. ♥️
Curious at how much fat your body contains? Then see our BAI (Body Adiposity Index) Calculator here to see if you’re at your healthy weight for your height.
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7. Giving?!
Ever wonder how certain people in your life got to be well-liked all around? Well, if you notice their habits and the things they do daily, they’re usually giving to others. Whether that’s saying a kind word to their coworker or getting a coffee for their spouse.
People are automatically repelled from those who are constantly taking. I would know! I used to be like that to a certain degree in late teens, early 20’s. I made friends but then they started to grow more distant towards me as they realized they were putting more into the relationship then getting back.
The Chinese have this word called, “Guanxi” which basically means to make sure you’re having a good flow of giving between you and another person. And you want to improve this “Guanxi” with others so that you can have the strongest relationships possible.
Being attractive isn’t just about wearing the right kind of makeup or clothing brands. A lot of it has to do with how you treat yourself and others.
So one of the best things you can do right now is to make yourself look and feel more attractive by giving yourself some self-love and loving others as well!
