A life filled with toxicity is not created by bad luck or circumstance; it is created by a cycle of bad habits and a negative mindset, by conditioning and by repeated habits, consciously or unconsciously.
We all have bad habits present in our lives that are ruining and hampering the level of growth in our life and it is never too late to eliminate these bad habits to improve the quality of your life.
Bad habits are continual practices that deteriorate the quality of your life; It could be mentally, physically or spiritually. With the buzz of the chaos of life, it is sometimes difficult for us to slow down, critically evaluate and reflect on the habits that we are cloning, both the good habits and bad habits and then amend these habits.
These bad habits could be the little things we do every day; the truth is that bad habits are hard to break but it is very possible. If you must eliminate these bad habits you need to work on the gears of your mind, not creating an anchor around the circumstances and people in your life.
I am going to share what helped in my journey to eliminate and quit these bad habits that reduce the quality of my life.
Let’s dive right into it, here are 10 habits to eliminate if you want to live a happy life. There are solutions I will give you if you want to turn these bad habits to positive ones right now. You have greater potential inside you from what is being realized right now and to do that, you have to stop doing these 10 bad habits consistently to help you break through and achieve your higher goals.
1. Comparison
This is a major spike of negativity we induce into our lives; we are often too quick to pull down our unique blinds, ushering in the transparency of others, more like we are constantly taunted by the light of the other person failing to realize that we carry so much more.
We have calcium in our bones, iron in our veins, carbon in our souls, and nitrogen in our brain. 93 percent stardust with souls made of flame, we are all just stars that have people names – Nikita gill
You have castles inside your bones, coronets in your heart, you are a unique being who has so much value in this world, you deserve to be here, you are loved, please don’t believe any different. You are magic even at your most broken!
This bad habit of comparison ushers in feelings of unworthiness, perfectionism, self-criticism, intense discomfort, loneliness, the urge to hide, aggression towards our self or others. Rather than moving forward we are held at a halt by these restrictions
Comparison is a self-inflicting violent act towards our self, our subconscious or conscious gets infiltrated with negativity.
At a very early age, we are exposed to the vices of comparison from the social media world; we compare looks, success, beauty, finance, growth, career and so on.
Comparison is a self-destructive act, you are not aware of the tracks the other person has to travel through his or her journey, the obstacles, the challenges, the swift lanes that lead to crashing, you never knew what their life is about, what they’re dealing with and the hidden battles they face.
When people strike the chord of comparison, it ushers in depression and demoralization from a stemming belief of insufficiency and self-sabotage.
Comparison ushers in a big limitation with jealousy, self-pity, self-sabotage; imposter syndrome, pride, not learning from past mistakes and these toxic elements get in the way of growth. If you want a happier life you have to eliminate every form of comparison that shortlists your flaws.
Remember that there are several parts of your magic, letting yourself be a work in progress makes more room for self-acceptance, which is what helps us get to where we’re wanting to go.
There is usually no one path, way or method that is right for you; what is your path is different from another person’s and it’s okay if it doesn’t look like someone else’s. It can be really challenging to come out of the cabin of comparison and if you are finding it extremely hard, I am just a click away feel free to send me a direct message on Instagram or an email for more directive, tips and resources and I’ll surely come through in replying your messages.
Mantras To Remind You Of Your Unique Identity
- The timing of my life is perfect. Everything is working for my improvement, my development and my good.I am not consumed by what I am not. I live in my truth and power.
- There will never be another me. That alone makes me wonderful, magnificent and special.
- My story is valid. It is teaching me something, it has a purpose and I am a living testimony of that purpose.
- 2. Negative Beliefs
Our thoughts are keys to our development and improvement, the thoughts we consume are capable of enhancing our lives or putting a stop to our rapid growth and development. Negativity is a bad habit that subtly creeps into our minds, configuring the shades of truth to falsehood.
These negative beliefs can be built from assumptions, challenges, criticisms, insecurities, anxiety, and fear of the unknown. Constantly harboring negative beliefs is a quick trip to unhappiness.
You cannot begin to change or eliminate bad habits if you don’t realize that they exist in the first place. The first step to creating any change in life is to realize change needs to happen, so start by acknowledging the bad habits.
Negative beliefs are cannibalistic, the more you feed it, the bigger and stronger it grows. People who project negativity typically have low self-esteem, they feel bad about themselves and their negativity is simply a reflection of those feelings instead of entertaining and processing these negative thoughts, take charge and challenge them.
The mind of a man is capable of anything; you can alter your life to a progressive lane through your thoughts. Rather than ushering in negativity with your words, adopt positive declarations. Instead of saying I’m behind in life, ask yourself where did the timeline idea come from, and is it valid?
Instead of saying I’m not enough, ask yourself who profits off of insecurity and beauty standards?
Instead of saying I’ll never find love, ask yourself how can I make more room for the love I already have?
Instead of saying I’m not good enough, ask yourself how can I be good for myself right now?
Instead of saying I’m going to fail, ask yourself since failure is inevitable in life, how can I let it be okay?
3. Unhealthy Routines Practices
We are what we repeatedly do; excellence is not an act but a habit. The routines we continually practice play a huge impact in our lives and most times we fail to employ positive routines to guide our daily activities.
We practice bad habits like checking our phones first thing in the morning, consuming too much sugar, spending so much time on social media, wasteful spending, long term use of pain killers, not drinking water, neglecting your emotions.
Your daily routines kick up your momentum to take charge for the day.
The quality of your routine and the activities you indulge in daily outlines the quality of your life. Every day you are making choices, you could choose at the beginning of your day as you are waking up to do the thing you know you have to be doing at that moment or the choice to fall back and find comfort in laziness.
These choices as little as they seem can greatly influence your life, waking and taking that first step of your routines starts the momentum. Stop trying to preserve your comfort state! Imagine if you execute your routines for a whole month? Start with a backbone of routines, then you can add more, consider removing negative routines as well, commit to doing it for multiple weeks to get your momentum.
Basic Morning Routine
- Wake up early.
- Change your alarm to something pleasant.
- Avoid your phone first thing.
- State one thing you’re grateful for today.
- Include movement and exercise.
- Don’t skip breakfast.
- Choose a podcast or relaxing music on your commute.
- Make your priority list before you check your emails.
- Breathe before you start your workday.
Basic Evening Routine
- Turn off your phone an hour before bed.
- Arrange what you will wear tomorrow, now.
- Make a plan for the day ahead, tonight.
- Read positive affirmations out loud.
- Write down what you’re grateful for.
- Set an intention for how you want to rise.
- Do a relaxing body-scanned meditation.
- Sleep in pitch black.
Successful powerful people have successful powerful routines laid down to properly manage their life and a person who is organized in life is always more relaxed. We are not opportune in organizing everything in our life because situations are not in our hands but we have total control of the basic things we can organize.
I have carefully outlined creative resources that can guide you in building and re-building positive routines; substitute your life with positivity and give yourself a happier life.
Resources such as how to wake up at 5am and slay your goals, ways you are wasting money without knowing and how to stop it, activities you should indulge in for a productive week, activities that can be killing your productivity in the morning, how to wake up earlier without feeling tired, things to do before bed and how to supercharge your mornings. These articles will surely leave a spike of change in your life if you properly take your time to dive into them.
4. Crave For Approval And Validation
We as humans are constantly trailing around for validation and a beam of approval from individuals, relationships, career and circumstance, and this bad habit deteriorate the happiness and quality of our life. It is so sad that the quest for validation and approval have been built as an addiction to happiness.
Validation is a powerful substance that intoxicates the human mind with negativity and this has to be weaned off. If you continually trail down this path of seeking endless validation you will be demoralized, your worth diminished and you will become so powerless.
From social media validation to approval from our circumstances and family, everyone wants to be liked, everyone wants to be accepted, everyone is in constant search for influence and failure to get such when we lack an internal balance can bring about depression and anxiety.
The first step to stop seeking approval is to build an internal validation, know your limits and the only limit is you.
- Reflect on the beliefs you hold about who you are.
- Identify what motivated your self-sabotage and the quest for validation.
- Acknowledge your shortcomings.
- Acknowledge your inherent worth.
- Apologize to yourself.
- Learn to forgive yourself.
- Identify areas of self-improvement
- Commit yourself to growth.
- Set clear boundaries for yourself.
- Remind yourself of your magic.
- Focus on nurturing a safe loving relationship with yourself.
5. Lack Of Authenticity (Following the crowd)
Struggling to be authentic can look like;
Being so concerned about what others think of you, that you stop acknowledging what you think of yourself, wanting to be liked by others and crossing your own boundaries to achieve that goal, seeking external validation to feel a sense of worth, rather than striving for internal understanding and acceptance, changing the way you present yourself to accommodate those you are with, only to realize that you no longer know who you are, ignoring your intuition for so long that you have a hard time recognizing what it sounds or feel like, internalizing people’s perception of you and ceasing to seek self-awareness and fulfillment.
Focusing on meeting other people’s expectations and ceasing to take responsibility for who you are becoming.
It’s so sad that a lot of us replicate a life of inauthenticity, we are tossed away by the quest and hunger for validation that we lose track of our journey.
We have to build confidence and be authentic not following the crowd in making certain decision in our lives. You can counter such imposter syndrome by your worth. Imposter syndrome says I don’t belong here, innate worth says you belong everywhere always.
My voice doesn’t matter—The world needs your unique voice.
My soul isn’t amazing enough to share—My soul might be exactly what someone needs.
Everything has been done already—you are allowed to add yourself to the pile.
I’m not good enough—You are always enough, and your fear doesn’t change that.
6. Quest For Perfection
Perfectionism says do more or do better, self-compassion says you’re doing the best you can and it’s enough.
Perfectionism says everyone has to like you, self-compassion says you have to like yourself.
Perfectionism says you can’t mess up, self-compassion says it’s okay if/when you mess up.
Perfectionism says Imperfect is bad, self-compassion says imperfect is the only option and its okay.
Perfectionism says our worth depends on your success, self-compassion says your worth is already inherent, regardless of your success.
I struggled with perfectionism for so long and this shut me behind the bars of depression and anxiety, I wanted every piece in the puzzle to be complete and properly laid and this delayed my growth and improvement level.
I procrastinated on several occasions because of perfectionism from the launching of my blog to creating content, setting up my YouTube channel, creating an online presence on Instagram
Perfectionism may seem beneficial at the surface level but when properly analyzed, it ushers in several problems; it makes tasks seem monumental because you want to do perfectly on them so you procrastinate, constantly tweaking will greatly limit you, you won’t be able to place things in order and move on because you are always second-guessing your previous decision.
Your skill development is hampered because you are not allowing yourself to make mistakes which are critical for your learning process, you incur a lot of anxiety and stress because you are holding yourself to an unrealistic idea, constantly worrying about your work being judged.
The major way to overcome perfectionism and eliminate this bad habit is that you have to realize that no one is perfect this isn’t always portrayed through the internet, we get so many collections of perfection from Instagram, Twitter, the social sphere as a whole and this automatically sets us on the edge of pressure.
People are so proud to show off their fruits but never show off the pump of resilience, hours that went into it, mistakes that they experienced and these are vital parts of the learning process.
If we have to come to the acceptance that we cannot have success without mistakes, you have to embrace imperfections, get started and make a mess this is allowed, improve each time your feet hit the ground and do not compare yourself to others.
7. Procrastination
Is there something else you are supposed to be doing right now? Is skimming through Pinterest at this very moment in your routine? Do you have unattended chores to chunk down, unread emails to reply? You should be indulging with those activities but you are standing on the fence of distraction.
Sadly, you are not alone on this boat, 20 % of the population identifies themselves as chronic procrastinators, people who constantly put off the things they need to do thereby creating accumulated lies you tell yourself. ‘’I’ll have plenty of time to finish this up, a 2 mins distraction on Instagram wouldn’t hurt’’ lies!
Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off until the day after tomorrow what should have been done the day before yesterday. People who constantly procrastinate have no guarantee of success.
The habits of always putting off an experience until you can afford it or until the time is right, or until you know how to do it, is one of the greatest burglars of growth, improvement, and happiness. Be deliberate and take action when you have the time for it, as well as doing things at the right time, don’t wait because the time will never be just right.
8. Preserving Negative Presence
Everyone must have been guilty of keeping toxic people in their lives at one stage or the other; we fail to realize that when you walk with trash you end up smelling the same.
We can’t eliminate bad habits and still preserve unhealthy and limiting companies because the energy we get is contagious. Relationships matter; the roles people play in your life will influence you so get serious about who you allow to affect you.
Nurture those relationships in your circle that foster success, happiness and continually position yourself among change agents and thoughts leaders. Distance yourself from people who disrespect you, mistreat others, are abusive, lie to you, are negative, have no goals, use you and put you down.
It’s important to get your surroundings as well as yourself into a positive state-meaning, surround yourself with positive people, not the kind who are negative and jealous of everything you do, surround yourself with good people, surround yourself with positivity and people who are going to challenge you to make you better.
9. Not Forgiving Yourself
We all make mistakes at one point or the other in life, we have to be able to let go of the results these mistakes have ushered into our lives to pursue happiness, you have to forgive yourself and learn to walk your way through pain from the pasts and mistakes.
One thing is for sure, you will make mistakes; learn from them, learn to forgive yourself, and do not continually hold onto these toxic emotions, they will interfere with your mental state.
Learn to laugh when everything falls apart because sometimes it will. Self-forgiveness is a daily practice of the strong, It is intentional preservation of inner peace and a reflection of a healthy self-concept.
Acknowledge your mistakes, validate your feelings, take responsibility, explore your motivation, recognize the lessons you’ve learned, set clear boundaries, approach yourself with love, compassion and respect, accept your humanity and make amends if applicable.
10. Dehydration
This may sound like a trivial issue but a lot of us fail to hydrate our bodies by consuming enough water for our body system to work. Dehydration occurs when your body loses more fluid than you take and when this happiness, it affects the balance of minerals in your body. For the last 3 weeks, I have been rigorously hydrating and the changes are visible.
Water helps maintain the balance of the body fluid and to prevent dehydration you need to drink an adequate amount of water. Health authorities recommend eight-ounce glasses of water which equals about 2 liters or half a gallon of water. Staying hydrated is crucial for your health and well-being, if you haven’t been hydrating enough the time is never too late to start.
For You
I’m glad that you made it to the end; I hope bringing these bad habits to light will enable you to eliminate them and improve the quality of your life. You have the power to create what you want. Change might not be fast and it isn’t always easy. But with time and continual effort, almost any habit can be reshaped
So find that silver lining today, find a tribe of positive and supportive people, make time to engage in activities that pleases you, create what you want to see, celebrate your wins and don’t wait for people to validate you.
